My itty bitty spiritual journey

The beginning

    When I was a little girl, I had a great sense of safety when I was outdoors. I loved nature and animals, like many other children do. I talked to plants and birds, climbed trees and swam in the brook. Trees were my favorite friends (except my dog oh, and the chickens) When I was maybe 12 I had a favorite tree, his name was Ulysses. I would sit under him everyday after school and have a chat or a cry, depending on my day. One day I came home from school and they were clearing the land to build a house. He was gone. I cried for what felt like forever.

     Fast forward to 1980. I was now the grateful mother of twins. We were out in my tiny garden, they were playing by my side when I suddenly fell to my knees, I couldn't hear, everything was blurry I thought, "oh god, this is it" when I heard a voice, this was no ordinary voice. I came from within me and from outside me at the same time. It was loud.. It said: You are whole, you are Holy and you must go! I was filled with the knowing that this was God speaking to me. I stayed on my knees for what seemed like a long time because I couldn't move. I realized that tears were streaming down my face. Slowly, my hearing came back and my blurry vision went away. But now, my hearing was beyond normal, I could hear the conversation the neighbors were having. My vision was other worldly, I could see the auras around the plants, trees and people near me. I told no one. This lasted for three days and then everything went back to "normal" and I ignored the instruction to leave for two weeks. Until I woke up suddenly one day, drenched with sweat and a loud voice in my head saying YOU HAVE TO GO, YOU HAVE TO GO, NOW! I packed up my two boys and moved back to Connecticut. I had $25.00 and no real job skills. I was scared, but I had to do it. That's where things really began to happen. One after the other I was introduced to my teachers. The ones who would change the direction of my life forever. And ever since then, I listen with my whole heart and look to see with my soul. Because I know that I don't have a clue what's best for me or what's next. What I do know is that God does. When that voice speaks, I listen.

    I also pray now. Even if I can't see my prayers being answered. Because I know that the are being answered. I am not the one who gets to choose how and where no matter how badly I want to. What matters is that I will continue to spend as much energy as I can sharing the grace I received with my fellow brothers and sisters, all of humanity, all of life, in all the universe, as long as I am able.